To the beautiful souls who I have witnessed not yet fully living your best life…here’s a letter to you from me. I am speaking for many mothers, fathers and caregivers of young adults who have expressed similar perspectives. I hope you or someone you love finds a spark of motivation in this and know every word comes from a place of love.
Dear Beautiful Soul of Mine,
I haven’t asked you lately about your job search or how things are going on that new project you started. But it doesn’t mean i don’t think about you and your life, often. I ponder how happy and fulfilled you are today. I ponder how much thought you give to tomorrow that isn’t aligned to the many conspiracies that have infused a myriad of thoughts that have resulted in choices and consequences that may not fully represent the life you want. Or maybe it does and I’m the one befuddled.
Whether I am close to being accurate in my perspectives or not, I have no other indicator because we don’t talk the way I wish we did. In that I ask myself if I can do anything to change that and I’m quickly reminded I can and I will. I know we cannot allow the convenience of technology to disable the art of effective communication. I honestly believe that’s part of a much larger societal issue but I will save that for another day.
Today I think it’s important for you to understand why I worry about you. Maybe it's because you are the first born and you were my opportunity to learn what it was to be a parent. Maybe it's because of my background growing up in a single-parent household then repeated what I saw. Or maybe it's simply because I know I did things and made choices that likely weren't optimal and introduced a level of over-protective conditions that didn’t build a sufficient enough foundation which was required to ensure when you got to a certain level in life, you would know what to do next. As parents and caregivers we have to own our part. I mean, I encouraged you to get an education and I led by example, making mistakes along the way of course, but I've done significant work to course-correct as much as I can. Nonetheless, I’m not sure now if my “making sure you had more than I had” yielded the expected outcome grit and motivation I desired. I just want to make sure your life is a reflection of one that was better than mine. Growing up in a better neighborhood, living in a house, going to better schools, driving at a young age, getting a car when you graduated from high school, going to college, living on campus, graduating with a college degree, getting a job, starting a career, having good credit, owning a home and overall just building a life that levels you up. While things didn’t turn out exactly in that order, you have done some wonderful things and achieved some great accomplishments. Just think about all the successes you’ve had along the way. Even if at some point things started to get confusing and potentially overwhelming, one thing stayed consistent - my love and belief in you to be great! Besides, you came from me!
While I'm not exactly sure what the future holds or what you need to get passed this current phase which appears to be somewhat challenging, it’s imperative for you to know I’m here to help in anyway I can. I always have been and always will be….that’s my job and I’m grateful to have been given the opportunity.
So my dear beautiful soul, let me share with you some of the specific things I worry about….perhaps you worry about them too. If that’s the case I hope the self coaching questions I leave at the end of this letter enable you to tap into a molecule of belief, a spark of motivation and a balance of the energy you need to fuel your direction and fulfill your dreams so you live your most purposeful life. To me that’s what really matters and that’s the journey I’m here to support.
Worries:
Not believing in yourself
Not tapping into all of your potential
Not trusting yourself
Not taking the first step
Not being able to take care of yourself now
Not planning for a future
Not having a sense of belonging in this life
Not knowing you deserve everything your heart desires
This is a good list to work with where you remove“not” from each statement and leverage these to create affirmations.
Affirmation Example:
From “Not knowing you deserve everything your heart desires”
To “I know I deserve everything my heart desires”
Self-Coaching Questions
What is my Plan?
What steps am I taking to achieve the plan?
How are the steps I am taking showing up in the outcomes I need to confirm I'm on the right track?
If I don’t have answers now, what will it take to get answers?
If I simply don’t know, what would I want my life to look like if I could just create it?
What small changes can I start making today to move me closer to living my dreams?
What matters to me most?
What are my values?
What’s most important to me right now?
If you are "someone's dear beautiful soul", a caregiver of a beautiful soul or just someone who stumbled across this and any portion of it resonates, I encourage sharing this with someone you love who could benefit from these words! 💜
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